Landon and Daniel have been best friends since grade school. Through
thick and thin, they’ve always been able to rely on each other. So it
only seems natural for Landon to step in and offer assistance when
Daniel has a run of bad luck.
Moving in together and splitting the bills seems like a simple
solution to Daniel’s financial problems. However, sharing close quarters
makes it difficult to keep less than platonic feelings on the down low.
The line between friends and lovers blurs during a late night moment
of weakness fueled by alcohol, leaving both men on uneven ground. Just
when they think they have things worked out and might have a shot at
something more than friendship, a sudden shared windfall provokes all
new complications that could end more than the new physical side of
their relationship.
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Excerpt
Dusk
found Daniel sitting in his living room surrounded by dented empty cans
of brew, two collapsed bags of the best greasy potato chips money could
buy, and the lotto tickets he’d purchased on a whim at the convenience
store around the corner. He needn’t have bothered—it wasn’t as if he’d
ever win—but old habits die hard. Buying the tickets and then watching
to see if they’d won was something he and his mom had shared for years,
before the cancer had ravaged her body and stolen her will to go on.
Even though she’d passed away the previous spring, Daniel still had
moments when he expected to see her sitting on the sofa in the living
room and waiting for him to walk through the door.Damn, he missed her.
She would have known how to put a positive spin on being laid off and
dumped in the same day. No one could find the silver lining in a
situation or cheer him up like his mom.
Daniel chugged what remained of the beer in his hand and swallowed
repeatedly until the only thing left in his mouth was a bittersweet
aftertaste and the hope of imminent oblivion. His only plan for the
night was drowning his sorrows with alcohol. He ran a hand through his
snarled hair and sighed in disgust. It wasn’t as if he needed to get up
early for work in the morning. He belched, crushed the can, and set it
on the table with the rest. Looked like a trip to the kitchen was in
order—his bladder protested, reminding him of something else he’d
neglected to do—right after he paid a visit to the can.
He stood and padded barefoot to the bathroom down the hall. His head
spun as he bent at the waist and lifted the toilet seat. Ignoring the
head rush, he took aim and let it fly, watching with detachment as the
water in the bowl turned yellow. The stream went on and on, with no end
in sight. Why did it always seem like more beer came out than went in?
Finally things slowed to a trickle and stopped. Daniel shook off and
tucked himself away. He flushed and watched as piss went down the drain,
just like his life.
After washing his hands, Daniel made his way into the kitchen and
grabbed another beer out of the fridge. He popped it open and took a
long swig while standing in front of the open door. Cold air wafted
across his overheated body, sending a parade of goose bumps up and down
his arms.
The front door opened and slammed shut. A familiar voice called out. “Honey, I’m home.”
Daniel snorted at his best friend’s standard greeting. There was no
wonder Perry hated Landon. Not that Daniel would have to worry about
that now. He grabbed an extra beer and a jar of pickles to munch on,
then headed back into the living room, where he found his best friend
kicked back in the recliner by the sofa. He reclaimed his spot on the
couch before pitching the spare can at Landon.
Landon caught the can with ease. “Thanks, man. I could use a drink.”
He popped the tab and took a drink. “So, what’s the deal? I thought you
had a date with the douche bag tonight, but I drove by and saw your
truck in the driveway.”
“I did. Things didn’t work out.”
“I can tell that much on my own. You look like shit.”
“Gee. Thanks.” Daniel leaned back and propped his feet up on the
coffee table. “You know, you’re not so pretty yourself.” If he were made
of wood, Daniel figured his nose would be growing for telling that
whopper. There was nothing ugly about Landon.
At approximately five and a half feet tall and thin as a reed, Landon
had always been a little on the light end of masculinity. He
overcompensated for his delicate features by being tougher than men
twice his size and having an attitude big enough to match. You wouldn’t
know it by looking at him, though. The man moved with the boneless gait
of a dancer. Kohl-rimmed peridot eyes that were as quick to narrow as
they were to warm. A gold stud dotted the right side of his narrow nose
and graduating hoops lined both ears from top to bottom. He wore his
midnight-black hair sheered close on the sides and spiky on top. Daniel
knew for a fact that the gunk Landon used to make his hair stay in place
smelled like ripe, succulent berries at the height of summer.
Unlike Landon, no one would ever accuse Daniel of being graceful.
Well over six feet tall and weighing in at close to two hundred pounds,
he was more akin to the proverbial ox in a china shop. One too many
growth spurts had him reaching six feet before he turned fourteen. By
the time he hit sixteen he’d shot up another four inches and was as
clumsy as a newborn colt. A healthy appetite and channeling all his
teenage hormones into working out had helped put some meat on his bones,
but control over his muscles didn’t make him any less prone to
stumbling over his own feet.
“What are you doing here, anyway?” Daniel asked. Landon worked
Thursday through Sunday as a bartender at a local club. “Shouldn’t you
be at work?”
“One of the other boys needs Monday off. I promised to cover his shift if he worked for me tonight.”
“Why?”
“Why not?” Landon shrugged, pulling the black fabric of his T-shirt
taut across his chest and shoulders for a fraction of a second. “Can’t I
be nice?”
“No.” Daniel loved Landon. They were as close as two men who weren’t
fucking could be. But Landon was the king of ulterior motives. “You have
a hot date tonight?”
“Come on, Danny boy. Don’t be so cranky. All I want to do tonight is
relax. It’s just my good luck that you’re home and can do it with me.
Unless the jackass formerly known as Perry is coming by later. If that’s
the case, then I’ll just head on home.”
Daniel snorted. “Not likely.”
“That doesn’t sound good.” Landon sat forward and rested his elbows on his knees. “You want to elaborate?”
No. He didn’t. However, Daniel didn’t figure he had much choice.
Landon would find out sooner or later. “You won’t have to worry about
Perry anymore. He dumped me today.”
“Oh, man. I’m sor—”
“Just save it.” Daniel glanced over at Landon and found the corner of
his friend’s lips curling and uncurling like he had an uncontrollable
twitch. The jerk was fighting back a smile. “I know you hated him.”
“What’s to like? The man’s a douche bag. Actually, a douche has more personality than Perry. You’re better off without him.”
“Easy for you to say,” Daniel mumbled into his beer. Landon had no
problem finding men. All he had to do was snap his fingers. Daniel, on
the other hand, couldn’t afford to be so choosy. Someone big, brawny,
and blue collar wasn’t exactly a hot commodity in the gay
community—unless you were into bears. Sadly, Daniel couldn’t even say he
fit into that demographic. His chest was as smooth as a baby’s bottom.
“Shit. I’m sorry. Do you want to…I don’t know…talk about it or something?”
“Hell no.” What was the use in blabbing about a failed relationship? It wouldn’t change anything.
“You’re really upset about this, aren’t you?”
“I’m damn well not happy about it.” Why would he be? Sure, he and
Perry had their problems, but they got along all right most of the time
and the sex was good. Now all he had to look forward to was a cold bed
and his right hand.
The recliner squeaked as Landon got up and moved over to sit beside
Daniel on the sofa. He bumped their shoulders. “Want me to go kick his
ass?”
Daniel snorted. “As tempting as that idea is, I think I’ll pass.”
Landon leaned back and rested his head on Daniel’s shoulder. “If you change your mind…”
“I won’t.” Daniel settled in against Landon, taking minor comfort in
the weight of his friend’s body pressing against his own, and tried to
think of a good way to say he’d lost his job without sounding any more
pathetic. He wasn’t looking forward to sharing the news. Granted, Landon
wouldn’t respond with the antipathy Perry had shown, but Landon had his
own shit to deal with. He didn’t need Daniel dumping all over him.
Feeling out of sorts sucked. It was like he’d been cast into a part
that didn’t fit. Usually it was Landon coming to Daniel with his
problems, not the other way around. Daniel was the more responsible one
out of the two of them. That was just the way it had always been—ever
since Daniel had stopped the school bully from stealing Landon’s lunch
on the first day of kindergarten. Afterward, he and Landon had sat
together and Landon had shared his cookies while cracking jokes about
the size of Stephen Lester’s big doody-head. They’d been fast friends
from then onward, through thick and thin.
Landon leaned forward and sat his beer can on the table. “So, I know
you said you didn’t want to talk about it, and believe me, I don’t want
to get into any touchy-feely crap, but what happened?”
That was as good an opening to tell Landon what had happened at work
as Daniel figured he would get. “I don’t want you to worry, but—”
“Oh Lord,” Landon blurted out. “Here we go with the protect Landon
routine. I’m a big boy, Danny. Nothing you have to say is going to give
me the vapors.”
“Let me finish, will you?”
“Sorry.” Landon waved his hand in the air. “Go ahead.”
Daniel met Landon’s gaze. “I lost my job today.”
Landon frowned. “Were you fired? Shit. What happened?”
“No, I got laid off. So did a bunch of other people.” Daniel chugged
his beer, letting the yeasty brew comfort his wounded pride. He belched
and wiped his lips on the back of his hand. “Apparently Perry doesn’t
want to date an unemployed bum.”
“That sanctimonious fucker! I really don’t know what you ever saw in him.”
Daniel shrugged. “He had his good qualities.”
“When are you going to learn that being able to suck the chrome off a bumper doesn’t make someone good dating material?”
“Yeah, well…” Daniel didn’t have anything to say to that. He was as
guilty of thinking with his dick as the next guy. “It isn’t like you
have a lot of room to talk.”
“I don’t date.”
“That’s my point. All you do is fuck and run, so you don’t know what to look for in a good boyfriend any more than I do.”
Landon scowled. “I know exactly what I want.”
“Which is…?” Daniel elbowed Landon in the side. “Come on, ol’ wise
one. Spill the beans. Tell me what to look for in the perfect man.”
“It isn’t important.”
“Uh-huh. Sounds like you’re full of shit to me.”
“Believe what you like.” Landon grabbed his beer off the table and
took a drink. “And anyway, we aren’t discussing me now. We were talking
about you.”
“Subtle way to change the subject.”
“Subtlety is overrated.”
“So says you.”
“So says everyone.”
“Whatever.” Daniel rolled his eyes and gave up. Sometimes Landon could be a stubborn little shit.
“Have you given any thought to where you’d like to apply for another job?”
“No.” Hell, it had only been a couple of hours since he was gainfully
employed. It wasn’t as if he could just snap his fingers and come up
with something better right away.
“I wouldn’t worry about it. I’m sure you’ll find something else
soon.” Landon patted Daniel’s knee. “In the meantime, you can file for
employment, and if you need more help than that, I could move in for a
while and help with the bills.”
Daniel stared at his friend. “I can’t ask you to do that.”
Landon seemed really interested in the top of his beer can. “You didn’t ask. I offered.”
“But still…” What was Landon thinking? They couldn’t move in
together. They’d lived together for a while back in school after
Landon’s lousy parents had given him the boot during senior year, but
that was different. They were kids then.
“Come on, Danny. It’ll be fun, like when we were kids, only this time
around we can get drunk and watch porn without having to worry about
your mom busting in during the good parts.”
“Or catching us beating off. OhmyGod. Do you remember that time you
stole that girlie magazine from the store and your mom walked in on us
looking at it? I thought I was going to die and I didn’t even get a
thrill from staring at all the naked women. I thought something was
wrong with me.”
“Hell yes.” Landon laughed and smacked his thigh. “I about shit my pants. She grounded me for a week for that.”
“Yeah, me too, since she called my mom and ratted me out.”
“It’s no wonder they were both shocked when we came out.”
“Mmm-hmm. Although I don’t think Mom was as surprised as she
pretended. No straight woman could possibly give that kind of lecture on
the risks of gay sex unless she’d prepared a little before hand.”
“You might be right. Be thankful all you got was an embarrassing lecture.”
“Fuck, I’m sorry, Landon. Your parents don’t deserve you. What kind
of douche-bags turn their back on their own kid just because he likes
dick?”
“Mine, apparently.”
“It’s their loss.” Daniel leaned in and brushed his shoulder against Landon’s in support.
“Fuck ’em.” Landon took a swig of his brew. “Hey, I know something
you could do. Larry down at the bar has been talking about hiring some
new go-go dancers.”
“Oh fuck you, man. No one wants to see me shaking my big, hairy ass at them.”
Landon glanced at the television. “I wouldn’t say that.”
Daniel glanced at the TV, absently noted a commercial for laundry
detergent that was anything but fascinating, and returned his attention
to Landon. “What do you mean by that?”
“I—” Landon tilted his head back and to the side and stared at Daniel
for a long, pregnant moment, his expression ripe with uncertainly. He
opened his mouth to speak, paused, then shook his head and smiled.
“Nothing. You just don’t give yourself enough credit. You’re a
good-looking guy.”
“Bullshit.” Daniel felt sure that wasn’t what Landon had intended to
say, but he let it go. If there was something else Landon wanted to
share, then he would…eventually. If there was one thing Daniel knew, it
was that there was no point trying to rush his best bud. Landon did
everything in his own sweet time. “You have to say that. You’re my best
friend.”
“No.” Landon licked his lips. He lowered his voice to barely above a whisper. “I probably shouldn’t say that…because I’m
only your friend.”
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