Sunday, December 16, 2007

Levitating Vampire Clown OF DOOM!

So the girl-child and I are wrapping Christmas presents this afternoon. She picks out the paper with the nostalgic scene of children peering in through the toy store window while it's snowing outside. I fold the paper around the box, she tapes it, then she looks again and says, "Ewwww, why do we have this paper???"

"Huh?" says I. "What's wrong with it."

her: "That clown is scary."

me (nervously, because all clowns are pretty much Pennywise to me): "Clown? What clown?"

her: "There."

She points. I look. Sure enough, there's a clown just inside the toy store window in the wrapping paper scene. What's more, all the little children clustered outside seem to be gazing in hypnotized rapture at this red-and-white-painted evil.

"Funny," says me. "I never noticed that before."

her: "Oh my God, it's hovering!"

I look again. And hell's donkeys if the damn thing isn't indeed hovering in mid-air.

me: "Oh my God, you're right! It's hovering! And smiling!"

her, wringing her hands: "Why's it hovering and smiling???"

me: "Maybe it's a vampire clown."

her: "Oooooh, nooooooo!"

me: "And it has all the kids enthralled!"

her: "Oh my God, there's a vampire clown on the wrapping paper!"

me: "A levitating vampire clown."

both of us together: "OF DOOM!"

Because everything's funnier with a little doom *g*

I'm thinking there HAS to be a manlove story in there someplace O_O
**creepy-hot visions of gorgeous gay vampires dressed up as clowns**

Scary Christmas, everyone!!!


Zot said...

No way. Nononononono, clowns in any form can't be the protagonist. Definitely not plain clowns (though they're pretty damn evil all by themselves) but most certainly not vampire clowns of doom!

They'd make a pretty good antagonist, though. Creepy carnival, evil vampire clowns, hot guys, tunnel of love, and a lot of double entendres. That could work...

Ally Blue said...

Argh! Stupid plot bunnies!

Amanda Young said...

OMG - That's hilarious!

Ally Blue said...

LOL It was one of our stranger conversations, and that's saying something *g*

zot attacked me with Levitating Vampire Clown Villain plot bunnies and I can't shake them off O_O

Zot said...

Hey, c'mon! It's not like I mentioned cotton candy blowjobs, tandem bumper cars, water slides, or Killer Klowns from Outer Space...

Ally Blue said...

Errrr... cotton candy blowjobs???
**disturbingly sticky-hot mental images**

Just please don't mention deep-fried Twinkies because they are WRONG on soooo many levels...

Zot said...

Oh, I dunno -- the only thing disturbing about those images is a lack of a boyfriend to make 'em real. Besides, you know sweet and salty go well together... :P

Deep-fried twinkies are only good for innuendo and mocking. Ick. Deep-fried ice cream, on the other hand, can be a thing of exquisite beauty. Alas, not carnival food.

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